Loss brings grief. Everyone hurts when they suffer loss and many losses are met with grief. The recent Florida school shooting brings the trauma of grief out in the open for all to see. Yet, before and after that singular tragedy there have been and will continue to be countless experiences of deep grief that are not so public. For many of us grief acts like a disease. Its symptoms can be deep and debilitating and its cycle is repetitive and exhausting. Grief stinks, and yet grief is an important and even healthy part of our coping with our traumatic personal losses. So, how do we go about finding the healing part of grief? How do we know what to hang on to, what to let go of and when any of this should happen? Finally, what can those of us who are not presently experiencing the grief of a personal loss do to help those who are in such pain and anguish?